Friday, 20 December 2013

Homage to Pierre Berton: Canoeing Lesson

POST #10
PARODY-LYRICS
ORIGINAL SONG: "I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do", ABBA, 1975.
PARODY COMPOSED:  Giorgio Coniglio, March 2013.

KEYWORDS: Canadian, goldenoldy, environment


"A Canadian is someone who knows how to make love in a canoe", Pierre Berton, eminent Canadian historian and journalist.


CANOEING LESSON

(to the tune of "I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do")

Intro: 

Need a location, eh? Lakeside assignation?
Space for two:
Canoe, canoe, canoe, canoe, canoe.

You’ll use the J-stroke, to steer straight; and for gay-folk
Take a crew;
Canoe, canoe, canoe, canoe, canoe.

Best pick a partner like Twiggy, but short;
Bow to discomfort if trapped ’neath the thwart.

Put down your paddle, when you climb in the saddle.
’musez-vous !

Canoe, canoe, canoe, canoe, canoe.

Wear your preserver, ’cause things might get rude,
If Mounties spot-check, and you’re in the nude.

Don’t lean on the gunwale, should you enter a tunnel;
This tip’s true:
Canoe, canoe, canoe, canoe, canoe.

Pierre Berton coined it our iconic boat,
Control paroxysms, you’re certain to float.

Get with your tête-à-tête, and not get quite soaking wet,
C’est beau !
Canot, canot, canot, canot, canot.

One final pointer:  l’avant-canotage –
Don’t flirt with fore-play pendant le portage.

There’s no better bateau built for Anglo- or Franco –
Vous et nous;
Canoe, canot, Canuck, canot, canoe.

Outro: 


Performing Notes

Enjoy chord-charts and lyrics at the Corktown Ukulele Jam songbook:
Corktunes: Canoeing Lesson

Intro: [C5,C]x2, [G,G7], C,C5,C,G

[C] Need [G] a lo[C]cation, eh? Lake[A7]side assig[Dm]nation?
Space for [G] two:
Ca[G7]noe, canoe, canoe, canoe, ca[C]noe. [G7]

[C] You’ll [G] use the [C] J-stroke, to steer [A7] straight; and for [Dm] gay-folk
Take a [G] crew;
Ca[G7]noe, canoe, canoe, canoe, ca[C]noe. [G7]

[Gm] Best pick a [C7] partner like [F] Twiggy, but [Dm] short;
[D] Bow to dis[D7]comfort if [Dm] trapped ’neath the [G7] thwart.
.........

Outro:  [C,G,G7,C] x4, fade-out
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