SINGABLE LIMERICKS
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| motif on a fashion T-shirt |
to "The Limerick Song", as in "The Flea and the Fly". See sactoGranny's recording on YouTube here.
LIMERICK VERSE: Most of theses original limerick verses written by Giorgio Coniglio have been web-published at the OEDILF website (the Omnificent English Dictionary in Limerick Form).
PARODY COMPOSED: Musical collage by Giorgio Coniglio, October 2016. An earlier version was web-published at AmIRight.com as "The Limericks of Gun Control".
CONTENTS:
1. Web Purchases
2. Paranoia
3. Terror Watch List
4. Concealed Carry
5. Vendetta
6. Hitmen
7. Bearing Arms
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| Logo of OEDILF, the limerick dictionary |
CONTENTS:
1. Web Purchases
2. Paranoia
3. Terror Watch List
4. Concealed Carry
5. Vendetta
6. Hitmen
7. Bearing Arms
RELATED MATERIAL: HOTLINKS
See also these other blogposts for other singable limericks on this topic:
The Sounds of Gunfire , post #134
The Sounds of Gunfire , post #134
The Bipolar Illness of Gun-Toting Phyllis, updated to post #184
THE LIMERICKS OF GUN-CONTROL
(to the tune of "The Limerick Song" . Display of the lyrics has been condensed to 4 lines for each verse, with internal rhyming in line 3, rather than the more customary 5-line limerick format.)
1. Elmer Fudd, a myopic fanatic,
Dreamed new schemes based on urgings ecstatic:
With his web-purchased gun, he could 'wub out' Bugs Bunny
In bursts of firepower automatic.
2. Crazy 'Syracuse' Jaques had to choose
To inform his co-workers, "J'accuse."
He thought THEY ought to note that they'd gotten his goat:
"My new Uzi can give them this news."
3. On the Terror Watch List you still linger?
For a weapons freak you're a dead ringer?
Here's the gist: while you're keen, buy an AR-15;
Til it's fired, cops cannot lift a finger.
Dreamed new schemes based on urgings ecstatic:
With his web-purchased gun, he could 'wub out' Bugs Bunny
In bursts of firepower automatic.
2. Crazy 'Syracuse' Jaques had to choose
To inform his co-workers, "J'accuse."
He thought THEY ought to note that they'd gotten his goat:
"My new Uzi can give them this news."
3. On the Terror Watch List you still linger?
For a weapons freak you're a dead ringer?
Here's the gist: while you're keen, buy an AR-15;
Til it's fired, cops cannot lift a finger.
4. Here's the grave plot of secretive Gary,
Who with weapon concealed was quite chary;
But the chain of Pam's locket got caught in his pocket --
The upshot resulting was scary.
5. A honeybee trapped in the bore
Of a gun could foresee what's in store.
Said the bee, "I had betta flee this lethal vendetta;
I'll get zapped if they trigger a war."
Who with weapon concealed was quite chary;
But the chain of Pam's locket got caught in his pocket --
The upshot resulting was scary.
5. A honeybee trapped in the bore
Of a gun could foresee what's in store.
Said the bee, "I had betta flee this lethal vendetta;
I'll get zapped if they trigger a war."
6. A churchgoing veteran named Pluggett
Taught novice thugs this hitman's nugget:
If repentance you crave, lay your gun near the grave,
And be sure to pray after you've dug it.
Taught novice thugs this hitman's nugget:
If repentance you crave, lay your gun near the grave,
And be sure to pray after you've dug it.
7. A consortium of ursine arms-vendors
Struck gold when they sold ClawExtenders,
Thus fulfilling the prayers (and the right to arm bears)
Of good Second Amendment defenders.
Struck gold when they sold ClawExtenders,
Thus fulfilling the prayers (and the right to arm bears)
Of good Second Amendment defenders.
UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT
(Click on any chord-chart slide to move to 'song-presentation mode'; then navigate through thumbnails at bottom of page.)
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