Wednesday, 14 February 2018

Russian Hacking: Red Army Choir Sings Classic Limericks

POST #169
PARODY-LYRICS, based on traditional poetry (limericks)
ORIGINAL SONG: "Ochi Chornye" - "(Dark Eyes)" poem in Russian by Hrebinka 1843, set to music in 1884; recorded by Al Jolson, Django Reinhart, Louis Armstrong, Red Army Choir, Fyodor Chaliapin, Ivan Rebroff etc.
ORIGINAL POETRY: At Wikipedia (click here), you can find a discussion of limericks dealing with the 'man from Nantucket'.
SATIRE COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, February 2018.

CONTENTS: 
1. "Dark Eyes": English translation of the Russian version as sung by Chaliapin. 
2. Triumph - Russian Hackers
3. Rationale - Russian Hackers 
4. "There once was a man from Nantucket" - unattributed, modified
5. Re Einstein's Theory of Relativity  - Richard Buller, modified
6. "A flea and a fly in a flue" - author unknown, modified
7. Doping and Duping - Russian Hackers
8. Reprise - 'chorus' of original song


RED ARMY CHOIR SINGS CLASSIC LIMERICKS

(to the tune of "Ochi Chornye" - Dark Eyesdisplay of the lyrics has been condensed to 4 lines for each verse, with internal rhyming in line 3, rather than the more customary 5-line limerick format.) 

1. Oh, those gorgeous eyes, dark and glorious eyes
Burn-with-passion eyes, how you hypnotize
How I adore you so, how I fear you though
Since I say you glow! Now my spirit’s low!

2. A huge triumph for our Russian hackers
With support PUT IN by Kremlin backers. 
Secret intrusion: seek Red collusion 
Get the goods on sad Trump detractors.

3. Rationale why we try subvert the West?
We need silly poems; you guys got the best.
No laugh Soviets; Putin still says ‘Nyet”. 
So steal comedy; we’ll be funniest.

4. Once was oligarch from Nantucket
Hid all cash in pail. Tax? He’d duck it. 
But his daughter Nan had a man with plan -- 
Informed KGB, then stole bucket.

5. Lady traveller, named Miss Brightsky,
She exceeded ‘c’, speed of lightsky. 
She set off from Omsk, took train back from Tomsk, 
And returned next week, Sunday nightsky.

6. Trapped in samovar, were a flea and fly,
(English word is 'tea'; Russians call it 'chai').
They played sweet guitar, smoked Cuban cigar,
Though when water boiled, they would surely die.

7. Though the IOC dinged us for doping
It's a banner-year, Vladimir's hoping:
Covert medals scooping, for fake news and duping -  
Hacking Team's geared up for interloping.



UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT 














































































Sunday, 4 February 2018

Shania Twain's "VERSE!": An Anthem for Limericists

Post #168
PARODY LYRICS
ORIGINAL SONG: "Up!"  is the lead song in the eponymous album recorded by Shania Twain in 2002. The song, in a light country/western format, is notable for its use of a limerick-like rhyme, AABBA, in its five-line verses. As the scansion of "Up!" doesn't fit with the anapestic (x-x-X) triple-rhythm of limericks, some changes were required to modify the traditional limerick stories recounted in this parody.
PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, January 2018. 
SONGLINK:  The verses of this song demonstrate the possibility of using novel song melodies to sing the stories of classic limericks. 



"VERSE!"

(to the tune of "Up!" by Shania Twain)

| I'm hooked on verse| x4

Seems things have gone from bad to worse:
Can't be effusive, must be terse, 
I found an online limerick site,
That would accept my poems alright,
And now I'm hooked on 5-line verse. 

Spend all my time in writing 'lim's.
Don't socialize with hers or hims. 
My brainscan shows a funny bulge  
Where, without limits, I indulge
All my versifying whims.

Limn, limn, limn -  
A verb for 'suffuse with light'.
Lim, lim- 
Great poem if your scansion's right 
Lim, lim'rick - 
A lulu, it's out of sight. 

Out on Nantucket lived a man;
Kept all his cash hid close at hand, 
Until the day when Nan his daughter
She eloped, she shouldn't oughter,
Then she ran off with his can. 

A flee and fly inside a flue
They didn't know just what to do.
The flea opined that they should fly
The fly declined, I don't know why;
They couldn't find the flaw, can you? 

A lady traveler named Miss Bright
On trips made time faster than light.
One day with relatives (poor lass)
Converted energy to mass,
Then she returned the previous night. 

Limn, limn, limn -  
A verb for 'suffuse with light'.
Lim, lim -   
Great poem if your scansion's right 
Lim, lim'rick  - 
A lulu, it's out of sight.

AABBA 
AABBA
AABBA
... yeah  

On limerick verse here is my slant:
No question if you should or shan't. 
If you just take aim and edit
And don't rant; that's to your credit
Once you shoot, you can't recant.

So, I'm addicted: writing lims.
Don't socialize with hers or hims.
My brainscan shows a funny bulge  
Where, without limits, I indulge
All my versifying whims.

I'm hooked on verse;
On 5-line verse;
| I'm hooked on verse| x2

AABBA 
AABBA
AABBA

yeah . 



UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT






























Friday, 2 February 2018

Filastrocca: Pisa's LEAN TRATTORIA

Post #167
PARODY LYRICS
ORIGINAL SONG: "Santa Lucia" was a traditional song in the Neapolitan language, describing the appeal of an evening boat trip on the harbor in the Borgo (district of) Santa Lucia of Naples; it became a popular song after translation into Italian in 1849. It has been performed and recorded (links to Youtube) by many operatic singers e.g. Caruso, Lanza, Pavarotti and Bocelli, and also by Elvis Presley (first verse only).  
PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, January, 2018. (The skeptical reader may surmise that the substituted lyrics are, in fact, about food intolerance, but the Italian setting and song make for a more enchanting experience.)
SONGLINK: Check out an earlier posting on this site entitled "Singable Limerick-Medley #19: Eating Italian" for the story of Gino, sung in a different format. The first 2 verses of the song here demonstrates the opportunity to use novel song melodies to sing traditional limerick-verse. 

filastrocca: Italian for 'doggerel', 'rigmarole' or 'nursery rhyme'


FILASTROCCA: THE LEAN TRATTORIA OF PISA


(to the tune of "Santa Lucia": Note: the first two lines of each verse are repeated in most recordings of this song)

CHORUS
Sul mare luccica, l’astro d’argento
Placida รจ l’onda, prospero il vento.
Venite all’agile
Barchetta mia;
Santa Lucia! Santa Lucia!

There was a foolish man, lived on Nantucket, 
Kept all his cash at hand, hid in a bucket.
One day his daughter Nan
Ran off with an older man;
Santa Lucia! The bucket? Nan took it.

Sneaking treats from his own gelateria,
Gino was suffering frank diarrhea,
“Flatus: such awful gas; 
Gelati? I’d better pass."
Bought a bakery(a) , now lives lactose-free-a.

Reprise: Where is Gino? Let's look and see, ah!
Tasting dough in his pasticceria,
Food-induced ills persist; 
Physicians, they now insist 
I should call it quits, and .. exist gluten-free-a." 

Fat-free meals: Gino dreamed this fine idea
For his food enterprise number th(a)ree-a
(He had grown quite obese, 
Once GI symptoms ceased) – 
Now he'd start up Pisa's 'Lean Trattoria'.

Repeat CHORUS.


UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT:




































Friday, 26 January 2018

An Irish Ballad (Black Velvet Band) Revisited: "VANCOUVER'S ISLE"

Post #166
PARODY LYRICS
ORIGINAL SONG: "Black Velvet Band" traditional Irish pub song, as arranged by the Irish Rovers 1967. Of note, the Irish Rovers' 50th and putatively final tour took place 2 years ago, ending with St Patrick's Day concerts in Vancouver and Nanaimo BC. 
PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, January, 2018. 
SONGLINK: Check out an earlier posting on this site entitled "Singable Limerick-Medley#3: A Visit to Chemainus, B.C."













VANCOUVER'S ISLE


(to the tune of "Black Velvet Band")


From that oversized town called Toronto
Retirees take pains to be gone;
What with prices as lush as the co-ondos,
Early May, frozen slush on the ground.

I booked tickets by air to Vancouver,  
To the West Coast I thought we might move;
You can fly A.C.*, Westjet (not Porter)
Your relations are bound to approve. 

I'd go straight on to Vancouver Island,
And there I'd explore for a while.
I'd spend time with my bro in Nanaimo
August weather's sublime - that's my style.

But bad misfortune overcame me, 
Paid a penalty, rebooked my flight.
I did land in October, and so did a sober-
ing storm on the very same night.

It can rain on the plains and the prairies.
And in Banff, it can rain there a while.
There's no rain that's a pain, it's not hard to explain,
Like the rain out on Vancouver's Isle.

Spent ten days hunkered down in Nanaimo,
Tried to drive around, poured every mile,
Had to run from the car to the tavern door --
That's a sport out on Vancouver's Isle.

In a bar not too far from Chemainus
A guitar-man sang out this refrain,
"Frequent downpours and drizzle abolish life's sizzle.
Cherish sunny climes? Get on a plane."

"When you fly here with Westjet (not Porter),
Can't extinguish the anguish most vile.
There's no rain that's a pain, it's not hard to explain,
Like the rain here on Vancouver's Isle."

I've retired now to South Carolina --
Coastal mornings are mostly quite fine.
Folks complain should it rain; it's so flat - doesn't drain;
They've got nothing about which to whine.

It can rain on the plains and the prairies;
Banff and Jasper - it rains there in style.
There's no rain that's a pain, it's not hard to explain,
Like the rain out on Vancouver's Isle.

*  A.C. = Air Canada. Westjet is a competitor on flights across the country. Porter provides more local service from Toronto Island Airport to destinations in Eastern Canada and the East Coast of the U.S. 
Chemainus: shuh-MAY-nuhs
Nanaimo: nuh-NIE-moh




UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT



















































Tuesday, 23 January 2018

Singable Limerick-Medley #28: Etymology Help!

Post #165
SINGABLE LIMERICKS 
ORIGINAL SONG: These verses can be sung to  "The Limerick Song", as per YouTube here.
LIMERICK VERSE:  Original verses composed by Giorgio Coniglio, and compiled in January 2018
. Some of the verses have been submitted to the OEDILF website (the Omnificent English Dictionary in Limerick Form). 
CONTENTS:
1. Dollar
2. Horse
3. Roach
4. Miser
5. Mystery
6. Haven
7. Gizzard
8. Lagoon
9. Dog
10. Mentor
11. Suitor
12. Whelp
13. Toff


ETYMOLOGY HELP!

A LIMERICK MEDLEY

(to the tune of "The Limerick Song"; display of the lyrics has been condensed to 4 lines for each verse, with internal rhyming in line 3, rather than the more customary 5-line limerick format.) 


1. Hey! Online Etymology Scholar,
Derivation explain for the 'dollar' —
Just as 'buckskin' spawned 'buck', it's a name that has stuck —
Widespread coinage from Europe: the thaler.

2. Etymology Online Resource,
Derivation explain for the 'horse' —
No link that's found, pal, with Pferd, equus, cheval;
The old English form 'hors' ran its course.

3. Hey! Online Etymology Coach,
Derivation explain for the 'roach' —
Cucaracha that's neutered, as Victorians tutored;
For, who cockroaches' love-life would broach?

4. Etymology Online Advisor,
Derivation explain for the 'miser' —
Middle English for 'wretch' from the Latin for 'kvetch'.
Modern usage? There's no one the wiser.

5. Hey! Online Etymology Oracle,
Divulge facts about 'mystery' historical' -- 
Greece and Rome: 'secret rites'; later, 'Dark, stormy nights...'
Now this query -- It's merely rhetorical? 

6. Hey! Online Etymology Maven,
Derivation explain for the 'haven' —
Old Norse Hofn: for 'port' from which Norsemen resort
To spread 'havoc' midst folks who are craven. 

7. Hey! Online Etymology Wizard,
Derivation explain for the 'gizzard' —
Roman gourmands would howl, "More gigeria (fowl
Innards)!; hold off the garum and lizard."

8. Etymology Online Kahuna,
Derivation recall for 'lagoon' -- A  
Spanish lake or salt pool (not Hawaiian, you fool!),
I've forgotten the rest - a lacuna.

9. As confessed, "We did doggedly slog
At Online Philological Blog.
There's no getting around, your word hounded out 'hound':
Etymologists find it a dog."

10. Hey! Online Etymology Centre,
Derivation explain for the 'mentor' --
Guide described in the story of Ulysses, whose glory
Homer told as a sage (or inventor).

11. In that vein, Etymology Tutor,
Derivation explain for the 'suitor' --
Latin secutor: 'follower', one whose prospects grow hollower
When Ulysses returns to dispute her. 

12. Hey! Online Etymology Help,
Derivation explain for the 'whelp' --
'Naive boy', root for 'puppy' (Not a hippy or yuppie).
It's Old English -- the same goes for 'yelp'.

13. Hey! Online Etymology Prof,
Derivation explain for the ‘toff' -- 
(Nineteenth C.): Oxbridge chaps with gold tufts worn on caps
Titillated the townies to scoff.




UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT 





Check out  the origin of the 'DOLLAR' at Wikipedia#1, Wikipedia#2, and The Online Etymology Dictionary.








Check out the origin of the 'HORSE' at Wikipedia  and The Online Etymology Dictionary.








Check out the origin of the 'ROACH' at The Online Etymology Dictionary.







Check out the origin of the 'MISER' at  The Online Etymology Dictionary.























Check this link for 'weird foods in Ancient Rome'













Check out the mystery in the origin of the word 'DOG' at The Online Etymology Dictionary and at Wikipedia.